A couple days ago, I was conducting an interview for a magazine article I’m writing. During a lull in the action, I flipped through the notebook I’d grabbed at random when racing out the door, baby on my hip and coffee dripping down my wrist. Across the back pages, I found doodles of crows (that really looked more like black chickens) and an endless list of potential business names and taglines.
This was the last notebook I used when I was a college library administrator. Suddenly I remembered sitting in a windowless room during some interminable presentation about online catalog technology. I was dreaming my way out of a job that I’d long since outgrown. And I was dreaming a future that I wouldn’t really own for years. Entrepreneurship wanted me.
That was spring of 2010. Let’s fast forward to the dawn of 2015.
The Year as Quest, The Life as Quest
I love what Jeffrey Davis puts into the world – both as the founder of Tracking Wonder and as the father of a couple of sweet little girls (our kids are the same ages and we’ve had the privilege of parenting together at many a preschool gathering).
Right now, he’s instigating and championing #Quest2015 – a month long exploration of the year to come: “12 days with 12 visionaries to imagine your best 12 months.”
Today’s prompt comes from Jason Silva:
In what ways might you artfully curate your life in 2015 to occasion serendipity, creativity and awe?
Ontological designing says: We design our world and the world designs us back.
What are the linguistic and creative choices you can make in 2015 that will in turn act back upon you and transform you?
Having watched one video from this Shots of Awe guy, I understand that Jason Silva really, really loves words and ideas and he eats hyperbole for breakfast (and likely thinks it’s AWESOME!).
I’m looking through the high octane, polysyllabic means of expression and focusing on “what choices you can make in 2015 that will in turn act back upon you and transform you?”
I made transformative choices back in 2010 when I allowed myself to imagine entrepreneurship and freedom from the 9 -5. Now that I sit on my bedroom floor in a pool of midday sunlight while my second baby sleeps and sighs, I see myself and my circumstances utterly changed.
Four years ago, I looked like a bored woman in a blazer in that conference room. I was actually an alchemist sketching a spell that would change not only my life, but the life of my future child and the life of every person I get to reach as a writer and an entrepreneur.
“We design our world and the world designs us back”
2014 has been a tremendous year for me (though it didn’t always seem that way, moment to moment).
I gave birth to the second baby who finally made me feel complete (I didn’t realize I was waiting for her all along. Once all the main characters made it to life’s stage, the show could really begin).
I admitted that I needed to do something else to truly feel complete too: I’ve committed to writing “my novel” (that first novel that I’ve been longing to write since about third grade). Thanks to Jeffrey’s mentorship, I’ve stepped up and walked the talk by participating in the Your Brave New Story author’s intensive. Sovereign Reality will make it to “complete shoddy first draft” by the end of 2015.
But there’s one more thing… There’s one more thing that I’ve been dancing around and struggling with and trying to push away: my relationship with my work and how I invite my patch of the planet to work with me.
Redesigning My Relationship to Online Empowerment
Corinna and I have been working together since 2012. A connection became a collaboration which became a partnership which became a fact of life. She and I have been a WE.
I love this woman and I love having her support. I have had the privilege of holding her dreams in the same pocket as my own.
But I have to shift my dreams to a different pocket.
Online Empowerment is a beautiful brand with a great, great vision. It just turns out it’s not my vision. At least, it’s not mine enough to compete with my family and my fiction… It would never “win” enough to thrive. Trying to support a brand and a vision that isn’t aligned with those tremendous 2014 changes has meant I’ve been designing a life that is disjointed and difficult, drenched in scarcity and burdened with guilt.
I need to turn to the one force that will tie together all the pieces that are MINE: author, writing coach, online presence strategist, healer, lover, mom…
There’s only one force on this earth that can do that.
Designing My World, Designing Me
In 2015, the world will see my transformation in the form of a new website.
MarisaGoudy.com (aka the once and future URL) will debut on January 1 and will be sporting the tagline “author and writing coach for creative entrepreneurs.”
You’ll still see me here at Online Empowerment as Corinna and I continue our collaboration when it comes to writing for the web, online presence development, and newsletter and website support.
How will this transformation affect the way we serve you?
I’m confident that I’ll actually be more available to the Online Empowerment community once I quit fighting against myself and I begin to focus on my dreams in a new way.
I’m also confident that Online Empowerment will reach new audiences who really need this sort of help thanks to my new quest.
Funny how this works… After years of asking clients:
- what exactly do you want to offer?
- Who wants to buy this (and are they your right people)?
- How does this particular offer help you reach your greater goals?
… I am finally allowing myself to answer that question in a completely truthful way.
Terrifying. Exhilarating. Necessary.
2015, you and I have some tremendous things ahead of us!
You’ll just see a landing page over at marisagoudy.com, but if you’d like to receive updates on Sovereign Reality and more focused messages about writing tips for creative entrepreneurs, please leave me your email address.